Hoping for Android help around the ranch – Red Bluff Daily News


I type on the dining room table instead of my desk because we’re having a scheduled power outage and I can’t see the keys in the dark. So, I brought my laptop downstairs where there is plenty of daylight.

We received a letter a few weeks ago about a scheduled outage on a Thursday – 8:30am-2:30pm. Apparently they would be replacing a pole. I pulled my truck out of the garage to avoid having to manually operate the door and made sure the coffee was made before 8:30. I was ready. Then there was no failure. I received another letter notifying me of today. But I must have forgotten to put an alert on my phone. So I only had one cup of coffee left in the microwave before the power went out. But I had a big bowl of cereal with raisins and the rest of the blueberries, so I’m not going to starve. I’m all set for “power outages,” but who wants to drag the generator around for a few hours? I have about an hour and a half of juice on my laptop, so I’m probably fine.

My wife said to me last night, “Who’s going to take me when I’m old?” “What do you mean? You’re young (she’s 48). By then, you’ll be asking Alexa to order you a self-driving car. ‘But what if I can’t walk to the car?'” Then your robot will carry you, honey – that’s okay.”

I truly believe this will be our future. Autonomous flying electric taxis are growing, in addition to those that drive themselves on the road. And I’m sure robots will be fully functional, affordable, and in many homes 30 years from now. I’ve already stopped eating and mowing weeds, saving everything for the robot (just kidding CalFire). But I’m seriously hoping for help from androids around the ranch before too long. With $60 an hour handymen, and me getting lazier as I got older, I could definitely use one.

You know how Home Depot rents tools and equipment, and even the truck and trailer to get it all home? Maybe they’ll get a batch of robots programmed to do all sorts of things, like electrical work, plumbing, carpentry, etc. You will find the projects listed on their website. You enter the dimensions and details, they give you a price, and you enter the order. Then the robot pulls all the materials, loads them into a truck, and drives to your place to start.

I really think it will happen. After all, if robots can operate and build a car, they must be able to manage a bridge. The driving part is pretty much already there. I could even command a robot with a weeding arm and thousands of feet of trimmer line, and it would never run out of power. I just highlight the areas I want it to do on my online property map, and off it goes.

Have you looked at the prices for assisted living and full-time care? Renting a robot should be cheaper. It would bankrupt all those places. No one would ever have to move again. Of course, we would always have someone drop by and say “hello” and see how we are doing. But only to maintain the human element, because they wouldn’t be needed.

All vital signs and tests would be transmitted over the Internet. Tele-Doc consultations. Medically programmed robots to draw blood or administer full resuscitation procedures while calling an ambulance. It’s all coming guys. I just need to live long enough for it to do me good.

Corky Pickering and his wife moved from the Bay Area to Cottonwood in 2014. He recently retired from the federal government as a lawyer advising law enforcement. He was a rock and roll bassist and Marine JAG. He can be contacted at [email protected]